Search Me

I like to share things that are intangible like new perspectives, humor and hate. This is less out of a desire to spread my experiences with the world for the purposes of mutual understanding and growth, and more because I am not able to horde new perspectives, humor or hate. That being said, I’ve compiled a list of all the search terms that have ever been used to stumble upon this blog! Even with the basic version which I’m using, WordPress does a great job of compiling and storing these stats, sorting them based on the number of times each term has been used and also parsing them out based on the country of origin. They range from odd (Australian) to interesting (U.K.) to depraved (South Korea).

Without any further ado, here are my only and therefore, my greatest hits!

NOTE: FURTHER ADO: I’ve arranged this with the search terms used most often at the top and terms used least often at the bottom. South Koreans, pretty much for your sake alone, I decided not to post which search terms have originated from which countries. The world pretty much likes you right now and I don’t want to change that.

Search Term
Well done, you’ve found me! The prize is my blog! Sorry!

count von count punching
That picture IS pretty awesome, good job!  It’s technically named “Down for the Count” and I linked to it in an earlier post; you can find it there or on the website The artist’s name is ‘poopbear’, and I am telling the truth.

 anime emotion looking mad
I guess that’s the face punching gif?

enemy mine cover
Weird. I never posted a picture of the cover of Enemy Mine but I did mention the movie.

dumb and dumber toilet
Haha, awesome.

newbie gal seeks scruples for sex this saturday night i am a first timer interested in voyeurism multiple …
Who would use this sentence fragment as an actual search term??

comic book punching
BAM! Now we’re talking!

chalkboard equation
I see word of my perpetual energy device has spread…

face punch anime
I can’t resist…it’s just the picture not the actual gif, but you get the idea haha. 

robot guy from grandmas boy
Haha. “How can he see me?!”

math black chalkboard
I wonder why they specified a black chalkboard? Perhaps equally brilliant chalkboard equations exist on green chalkboards?

equation chalkboard
Alright, perpetual energy, we get it!

rocky vs apollo punch
Haha, I punch you with friendship!

bitten in half
I’m glad lots of people have wondered about this too.

equation on chalkboard
Perpetual energy/Perpetual energy/Perpetual energy/Perpetual energy/Perpetual energy/Perpetual energy/Perpetual energy/Perpetual energy/Perpetual energy/Perpetual energy

paintball scenario
Is this from the one time I mentioned that I shot a girl in the nipple? For the record she was a stranger and she was very clear with me about how much it hurt after the match was over.

rocky vs apollo final punch
Truly one of the greatest punches in history.

infinity symbol math
I bet whoever searched this and ended up here was very, very confused.

chalkboard equations
Man, seriously? Ok, here it is!



walking dead novel
I love it.

anime face punch
Right THROUGH the face.

classic rocky apollo punch
Alright getting old.

alien sex movie
Now we’re talking, thanks [South Korea]!

alien egg birth
I hope you found what you were looking for here at bellobitesback.

punch anime
I’m catching a theme here.

rocky and apollo at end of movie
Several themes in fact.
Why is this so low in the search results? I think this one was only searched like three times. WHY IS THIS LOWER THAN “alien sex movie”???

aliciasilverstone depraved
Haha, she certainly is, internet. She certainly is.

happy meme dawg
Haha, I’d forgotten all about this one! Here’s another!

batman arkham city big infected thug
One of my first posts! For copyright reasons I should mention that though I incorporated several gameplay screenshots, I did not actually create, produce, script or code either of the xbox 360 Batman video games. But you know that, because take a look at my sad blog.

superman vs doomsday
An epic alien-a-alien punch.

i’m batman
I’m Batman.

darth vader no disintegrations
This one’s for you Fett.

as you enter the deceleration lane or the exit ramp, slow down
Yep, would have been useful to know a few hours before I wrote this.

busey hand gif
I love that someone else in the world knew that this existed and searched the internet for it.

punch in the face anime
Ok we get it! The internet likes that gif of someone’s face getting punched through!

tenacious d master exploder head explode
I did not mean…
To blow your mind…
But that shit happens to me, ALLL THE TIIIIIIIIIIIMMMEEEEEE!!!

most bums begging on corners are occupy personalities
Yiiiikes. If Republicans can find this blog, I should probably bury it deeper in the internet.

That’s more like it!

social lore
Here’s a person who knows what they’re looking for.

emotional question answer pictures
And another!

rocky apollo punch
Alright alright, I give:

potential and kinetic energy
Haha, looks like a smart person got diverted to my blog. Hope you made it out with all your brain cells!

die hard vs rambo vs terminator
Whoever you are, can we be friends?

biggest paintball guns
Ok, I guess.

whats made more terminator or rambo
Guessing Terminator but  too lazy to google it. More interested in who would win in a fight.

extraterrestrial attack sex women
I bet this person is very angry, just in general.

sexes of aliens
Another potential friend!

ki and

mass effect extraterrestrial
Gotta say I’m a little surprised this is so far down here.

wolf eating prey
Lone wolf!

evil bilbo
Haha, that picture of him certainly scared the crap out of me the first time I saw Lord of the Rings.

mosquitoes in my bedroom
Seriously, fuck those mosquitos, they were all up on us for like three days.
UPDATE: While we are no longer getting bitten, it is possible that one got away, likely through a trapdoor or secret escape route that I didn’t know existed. Don’t tell Sarah.

gaila star trek
Nice, nice.
I think someone was searching for my Social Lore post and then maybe had a seizure on the keyboard.

rocky vs apollo end
Ok, see above, not posting it again.

“social lore”
I like to think this is the same guy as before, but in the hospital bed recovering.

examples of pride biting you in the butt
Haha, that’s like the script of my life.

facehugger facerape
If I could go back in time and tell High School Bello that one day he’d have his very own website and furthermore that someone out in the world (we’re looking at you, South Korea) would find it someday by typing “facehugger facerape” into a search engine, he’d probably high five me so fucking hard that I’d instantly end up right here in 2012 writing this sentence right now while questioning the nature of reality and wondering why my high-fiving hand is so sore.

wolves eating prey

great punches
Hi friend! This must be a friend, who else would type “great punches”?

hot star wars female aliens with hot boobs
Ironically, this is almost the exact same search phrase I used when finding pics for this post.

dumb and dumber harry pooping face

darpa bow
More like ‘Bow to Darpa’ but yes, you get the idea. Now get on your knees before you get ripped apart by swarms of Robocheetahs.

butterscotch shower prank
You scoundrel!

I especially like that they put it in quotes!

Unknown search terms 55
This is probably for the best.

So let’s see! I’ve crunched the numbers (see: reviewed the list twice) and without doing any actual math whatsoever I calculate that over half of all the people who found this blog were actually really looking for one of these four main search terms:

  • hot alien boobs
  • a great punch of some sort
  • a chalkboard equation
  • a picture of Jeff Daniels pooping in Dumb and Dumber.

How can I give my readers what they really want, all at once?

I’ve got it!

“Please…kill me.”


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